The Clicking of Cuthbert – Quotes

“Such good news about Vladimir Brusiloff.”

“Dead?” said Cuthbert, with a touch of hope.

“The Clicking of Cuthbert”

“No novelists any good except me. Sovietski — yah! Nastikoff — bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P G Wodehouse and Tolstoi not bad. Not good, but not bad. No novelists any good except me.”

Vladimir Brusiloff being modest
“The Clicking of Cuthbert”

It is too much to say that there was a dead silence. There could never be that in any room in which Vladimir Brusiloff was eating cake.

“The Clicking of Cuthbert”

Few things draw two men together more surely than a mutual inability to master golf

“A Woman is Only a Woman”

The two men parted with a distant nod. I beg your pardon? Yes, you are right. Two distant nods. It was always a failing of mine to count the score erroneously.

“A Woman is Only a Woman”

. . . if there is a branch of modern industry where the demand is greater than the supply, it is the manufacture of knights and corsairs; and nowadays a girl, however flaming her aspirations, has to take the best she can get.

“A Mixed Threesome”

“Well, the natives seemed fairly friendly, so I decided to stay the night.”

I made a mental note never to seem fairly friendly to an explorer. If you do, he always decides to stay the night.

“A Mixed Threesome”

He told me later that just to watch her holing out her soup gave him a sort of feeling you get when your drive collides with a rock in the middle of a tangle of rough and kicks back into the middle of the fairway.

“Sundered Hearts”

The Ancient Mariner stopped a wedding guest on his way to a wedding; George Mackintosh gave me the impression that he could have stopped the Cornish Riviera express on its way to Penzance.

“The Salvation of George Mackintosh”

I played on them as on a stringed instrument . . .”

“Can you play on a stringed instrument?”

“As it happens, no. But as I would have played on a stringed instrument if I could play on a stringed instrument.

“The Salvation of George Mackintosh”

“I killed him with my niblick”, said Celia.

I nodded. If the thing was to be done at all, it was unquestionably a niblick shot.

“The Salvation of George Mackintosh”

The Ancient Mariner stopped a wedding guest on his way to a wedding; George Mackintosh gave me the impression that he could have stopped the Cornish Riviera express on its way to Penzance.

“The Salvation of George Mackintosh”